Archive for the ‘movies’ Category

DEATH RACE MOVIE TRAILER

June 17, 2008

&fmt=18

 

The movie Death Race 2000 was a 70’s cult classic starring David Carradine and Sylvester Stallone. A remake starring Jason Statham and Tyrese Gibson hits theaters August 22nd.

In the original (Roger Corman produced) movie America is overpopulated. A race is organized where contestants drive  across country and receive points for running over and killing pedestrians.

That plotline is too controversial for today’s studios. In the updated version Statham is a prisoner who races for his freedom.

DEATH RACE 2000

MORE DEATH RACE 2000 (SYLVESTER STALLONE)

DEATH RACE 3000

 

DEATH RACE (RELEASED IN 1976) WAS ONE OF THE FIRST CONTROVERSIAL VIDEO GAMES

 

DVD REVIEW: THE BRAVE ONE

June 9, 2008

I watched the movie The Brave One on DVD yesterday. Thank God I didn’t spend $14 to see it in a theater.

For those of you who’ve missed it, The Brave One features veteran actress Jodie Foster as an NPR radio host who goes all Dirty Harry after her boyfriend is killed and she is badly beaten with a pipe by muggers in New York.

Foster was paid a reported $15 million for her role as Erica Bain. That makes her a bigger criminal than anyone her character shoots in this movie. Foster is literally stealing money in this clunker.

It’s hard to see how this movie even got made. I’m picturing the Tim Robbins character in the movie The Player pitching his idea for a movie: “It’s like ‘Dirty Harry’ meets ‘Contact’…”

The Brave One should have been called Death Wish VI. It’s a complete and total ripoff of the series of Death Wish revenge flicks made by Charles Bronson in the 80’s.

If any male actor in Hollywood would have made this movie not only would he have never worked again, but the movie would have won at least five Razzie Awards as the worst picture of the year.

The writing in The Brave One is laugh-out-loud awful. For instance when Foster’s character makes her impassioned return to the airwaves she talks about her mugging,

 

“I always believed that fear belonged to other people. Weaker people. It never touched me. And then it did. And when it touches you, you know… that it’s been there all along. Waiting beneath the surfaces of everything you loved.”

The scene is embarrassing. It’s that bad. Nonetheless, The Brave One actually managed to get mostly favorable movie reviews. How is that possible?

Step 1: Take the most pedestrian revenge flick you can find.

Step 2: Cast in its lead a Hollywood lesbian icon.

Step 3: Make her character a National Public Radio host.

Step 4: Get the guy who made The Crying Game to direct it.

VIOLA! It’s art! 

 Actually, it’s crap. Even though she was nominated for a Golden Globe Award as Best Actress for this role (unbelievable!) the only acting Foster does in the entire movie is pretending to like boys. The Brave One features Foster kissing a man. I believe that’s Foster’s first on-screen male love interest since Maverick in 1994. The hapless Dead-Man-Walking boyfriend is played by Naveen Andrews. (He’s the long-haired guy from Lost.) In one of the most laughable casting choices in recent memory, Andrews plays a brilliant doctor. Apparently Fabio wasn’t available. Also, if there’s an award given for Most-Emasculated-Male-In-a-Supporting-Role I’d certainly like to nominate Terrence Howard for his portrayal of Detective Mercer in The Brave One.

Ordinarily movie reviewers treat mindless revenge flicks like this with complete disdain. But, apparently there’s a niche out there for lesbians who want to see Jodie Foster in a black tank top shooting bad guys.

JODIE FOSTER

 

BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN: THE OPERA

June 9, 2008

HEATH LEDGER IN THE 2005 MOVIE BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN

The New York City Opera has commissioned an opera based on the movie Brokeback Mountain. The opera is scheduled to premiere in spring 2013.

According to its plot summary Brokeback Mountain is a “cowboy romance about two ranch-hand buddies who start a homosexual affair when they meet on the fictional mountain in 1963.”

TRAILER FOR THE NEW X-FILES MOVIES

May 12, 2008

&fmt=18

NEW BATMAN MOVIE POSTER

April 26, 2008

TRAILER FOR UPCOMING MOVIE “ZOMBIE STRIPPERS”

April 23, 2008

&fmt=18

WILL ARNOLD APPEAR IN TERMINATOR 4?

April 23, 2008

What’s more pathetic than a 65-year-old Indiana Jones?

How about a 62-year-old Terminator?

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger says he may be part of a fourth movie in the Terminator series. Christian Bale and Moon Bloodgood are scheduled to star in Terminator Salvation: The Future Begins.

NEW TERMINATOR CHICK

TOP 10 JACKIE CHAN STUNTS EVER

March 27, 2008

&fmt=18

BLACK LIKE ROBERT DOWNEY JR.

March 9, 2008

You know what’s wrong with Hollywood?

Well, apparently it’s that there are too many African American actors with jobs.

The Drudge Report has an interesting blurb this weekend about Robert Downey Jr. being hired to play a black man in the upcoming movie “Tropic Thunder.”

doney.jpg

AMOS N’ DOWNEY?

How depressing! The part was originally written for a black actor and some skeezy, drug addict, white dude comes in and snakes the job.  Typical Hollywood.

stillerviet.jpg

Here’s another publicity shot from this upcoming epic. Apparently they’re kind of into casting against type.

In addition to Black Robert Downey Jr. we have: 

Muscled-Up Rambo/Type Guy: being played by Ben Stiller

and Blonde Guy: is Jack Black

This reminds me of the story awhile back that Hollywood was looking to make a movie about boxing legend Joe Louis (Yay!) and had cast Vin Diesel to play the “Brown Bomber” (Boo!)

 joel.jpgvd2.jpg

Before                  After

Hooray for Hollywood!