Well, terrific, here’s another GLARING example of special treatment for celebrities.

Billy Crystal is going to be at tomorrow’s Yankees/Pirates game in Florida. And he’s got REALLY good seats. Nothing unusual about that, right? I mean celebrities get perks like that all the time.

Except that Crystal is actually PLAYING in the game. Just happens that he turns 60-years-old on Friday and it’s always been his “dream” to suit up and play for the Yankees. So the Yankees signed him to a one day contract. With the full blessing and approval of commissioner Bud Selig.

Well, that’s just great. Hey, it’s my dream to have sex with Mary Mc Cormack.


and Daisy De La Hoya.


 and an Asian porn star dressed in a Little Bo Peep costume.


Hell, as long as it’s a “dream” let’s make it at THE SAME TIME.




But guess what? Just because it’s my dream doesn’t mean I get to actually DO it.  Unless I’m some washed-up old movie actor like Billy Crystal.

God, I hate celebrities!

I mean,  the Yankees and MLB could have found one of about 15,000 little kids with cancer to suit up for one lousy exhibition game. Maybe it was this kid’s dream to play for the Yankees:


What’s that? Oh, sorry little Billy. Go to hell! Major League Baseball has liability issues. Besides, you weren’t in *61.

Well, how about some regular kid?

Hey Little Johnny! Here’s your first lesson in real life:



Celebrities are just better people than us. They’re famous. So, they get to have what they want and you don’t.

Why couldn’t MLB let some season ticket holder or just somebody who’s not famous play in one inning of one exhibition game? Wouldn’t that be the greatest promotion ever?

And here’s my favorite part of the story. Wasn’t it Yankees manager, Joe Girardi, who was just lecturing the Tampa Bay players  THIS WEEK about competitive integrity and the “right way” to play the game?


Well, guess what? That hasn’t stopped Giriardi from engaging in a little celebrity jock-sniffing of his own.  He’s thrilled to have Billy Crystal on his team, “It’s kind of exciting,” Girardi said. “Billy Crystal has done a lot for this organization. He’s always been a big part of it. It’s ownership’s and our way of rewarding him and saying, ‘Thanks for everything that you’ve done.'”

Girardi then seemed to catch himself. Perhaps realizing what an ass-kissing schmuck he was starting to sound like he added, “It’s not all fun and games. If Crystal really wants to suit up and be a member of the team, Girardi said he’ll have to do the grunt work, too.”

“He’s going to have to run after practice,” Girardi said. Uh oh, with Bud Selig’s luck the guy will probably drop dead running in the outfield. Wouldn’t that be just the publicity that baseball needs!

Hey, MLB as long as you’re going down this route why not just sign Paris Hilton?


I’m sure she can do some things with a bat that Billy Crystal never dreamed of.

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2 Responses to “ASSHOLE !”

  1. shaqagain Says:

    I know that they always let you go to the front of the buffet line at the Rio…..

  2. Mara Says:

    You are so right on. Just because celebirties are in movies, shows etc and are known around the world they get more privlages because of it. Their pretty much treated like gods and goddesses and the worst part is that some of them think they are above other people because their celebirties. I mean this is going out of hand like magazines publishing of what celebirites do and people act like its so interesting and great because its the same things they do. Plus Billy Crystal is a self-asorbed ass-hole and they gave him this oppurtunity to play for the Yankees because he’s a celebirty thats so ridiculus and idiotic for that being their reason for letting him play and don’t give me that crap like he turned 60 well my grandpa turned 60 3 years ago and he didn’t get to play with the red sox.

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